Zazen

On Saturday morning, I attempted zazen. What is zazen? I am sure you are asking yourself. Nothing more than the Japanese word for meditation. Suzuki san, who is the man that has previously taken me hiking invited to me to join him in zazen. Friday, after work, I joined him and his friends, along with Tamo & Meghann for dinner, drinks, and companionship. Since drinking was involved and we needed to be at the temple to meditate by 8am - I spent the night.

After a hearty, Japanese breakfast - Tamo & I followed Suzuki san through the city, to the outskirts and drove up a small hill to the temple. This would be my first time trying to meditate. Furthermore, we would be instructed by a monk how to meditate. The first thing you do is remove your socks.

After a brief introduction in Japanese on how to meditate - we got into position. You sit on these black, round pillows. The position that you are supposed to meditate in is very difficult to put your body into unless you incredibly flexible. Ideally, you should place your right foot on your left thigh and then your left foot on your right thigh with the bottoms of your feet facing the ceiling. Your legs should be crossed so that the tips of your toes and the outer edge of your thighs form a single line. This position is called kekkahuza or the full-lotus position.

I could not get my legs that way, so I had to settle for hankahuza or the half-lotus position. Instead of placing both feet on the opposite thigh - you only choose one. I placed my left foot on my right thigh. After assuming position, you should have both knees touching the floor and keep a straight back. This should be supporting the weight of your body.

The rest of the bodys goes as follows: your chin should be in and you should extend your neck. You should keep your ears and shoulders parallel and keep your nose and belly button in line. You should place your left hand palm up into your right hand - palm up. Your thumbs should be in contact with eachother. Your hands should be in front of your belly button and your arms somewhat apart from your body. Your mouth should be closed. Eyes should remain open - but keep them at a 45 degree angle - this is to prevent you from daydreaming or getting drowsy - which would occur if you allowed them to close. Breathing should occur through your nose.

Once in position and before beginning to meditate - you should place your hands palm - up on your knees and sway your upper body from left to right a few times. When you finish doing this a few times, you put your hands back into the original position - thumbs together in front of your belly button. This is when you are to begin meditating.

The purpose of meditation is to empty your mind of all thoughts. This is supposed to help enlighten your mind and create a relaxed body. Most people aren't able to reach this state their first time and actually not for quite a very long time. You stay in this position for about thirty minutes. I don't really have a concept of the time - but I think the first 10 -15 minutes were fine - and I did okay. However, try putting your body into that position and continue reading my blog. It probably won't take you too much longer to finish this and I am sure you will experience some pain in your legs.

After probably 15 minutes - I couldn't clear my mind from the pain that I was experiencing in my left leg. My left leg was the one that was underneath my right foot. At first, it was a scary feeling - but it really scared me when I tried moving my toes and I realized I couldn't feel my entire left leg. While, meditating you should not move. My mind was racing and my body was hurting. I was thinking of things just to take my mind off of the pain. I was trying to move a little bit since it scared me that I couldn't feel anything. Finally, after almost having a panic attack, the monk started talking. I felt relief that maybe it would be over soon. I couldn't understand him. He kept talking and then I started thinking in my mind that I wish he would stop talking and say it was over. Finally, he rang the bell that indicates that we can move.

I quickly got out of position to discover my entire left leg was in a lot of pain. You turn around to face the monk. He started talking about what we needed to do next - but I couldn't concentrate nor watch him because I was too busy massaging my leg. Then, it was time to stand up. I couldn't really stand because I couldn't feel my leg. I finally got up - really only balancing on my left leg and feeling that someone was sticking knives into my right leg. Tamo thankfully whispered to me what the monk said to us while I was busy feeling like someone was trying to amputate my leg.

The next part of meditation is to walk clockwise around the room while holding your hands in the position you had them while meditating. Your footsteps should be in sync with your breathing. You take your first step with your right foot and only move forward by half steps. Only when your feet are together - are you to inhale - when they are a half step apart - you exhale. You are supposed to be quiet and not make much shuffling noises while moving. After walking in a line with the other meditators like this - you stop and bow.

Then - we are to chant a mantra. We are placed back into meditation position - which I was dreading. We were given a book in Japanese on the chant. You have to hold the book a certain way as well. You have it directly in front of your face and held with both hands. Your fingers are also to be in certain position. The mantra was 9 pages long. I was able to read the Japanese quick enough for the first 2 or 3 pages. After that, the speed of the chant gets quicker and I am not able to read Japanese that fast yet. I wish I could because it was very interesting. I also wish I knew what I was reading.

After that, you do a few more formalities such as bowing and fixing the pillow you have been sitting on. Then, it is done. The monk invited us in for some tea. Tamo left but Suzuki san and I had tea with the monk and another man that was meditating with us. It was very nice to have tea with them - although, I wish I could have communicated more with the monk and not need to rely on Suzuki san so much for language.

It was a great experience - and apart from the pain of being in the position - I really felt a difference in my thinking from it. I will go again - in January since my next few weekends have other commitments already. I read a book when I was in high school that explains about Buddhism - I think when I go home in January I will bring it back with me to Japan.

More on Zazen

Pictures from my dinner party on Friday night.